akaash vani great relationship lesson

Akaash Vani – Dare to Get Out of Dysfunctional Relationship & Live The Life You Deserve

May be a low profile film with no superstars but India needed a film like ‘Akaash-Vani’. We are living in 21st century progressing in every fields so fast, but it’s very painful to see that still there are so many people in India and also worldwide who are still clutching on to age-old reservations. There are still so many people, specially women who are wasting their lives continuing relations that are loveless, abusive or disrespectful. Why are they tolerating? Because they are worried about what others might think or say if they decide to get out of their relationships. They are afraid to correct their mistakes & take another chance to get the life they deserve. My hope is that this movie will give the courage to all those women to kick those relationships & go for the life they deserve.

Akaash Vani Plot 

The movie starts with a very beautiful love story between Akaash & Vani who meet each other & feel an instant connection at the very first day of their new college. They spend many beautiful moments together. When the college days are coming to an end, they start thinking about informing their parents. Vaani starts worrying as she isn’t sure whether her parents will agree or not. They plan that Akaash & Vani’s other friends will visit her house to attend her elder sister’s marriage. And finding a suitable moment Vani will introduce Akaash to her parents. Vani returns home. Akaash and Vani both eagerly wait for the day when finally they can tell her parents about their relationship.

But suddenly few days before the marriage ceremony Vani’s sister flew aways with the guy she loved. Vani’s sister told her parents earlier but they were against the relationship as the guy was from difference cast. This incident breaks down Vani’s parents completely. They are asked questions, criticized, ridiculed everywhere they go. Vani feel so bad to see her parents suffer that she decides not to tell about Akaash at this moment. Akaash moves to UK to study & constantly asks Vani when is she planning to tell her parents about him. But Vani can’t decide. Then suddenly one day Vani’s parents arrange her marriage with some groom they liked. Vani is in complete shock. She didn’t see this coming. As she don’t want to hurt her parents again after what her sister has done, she decides to sacrifice her love for the sake of her parents’ happiness. Vani’s decision completely shatters Akaash. Vani wasn’t happy either.

Anyway she gets married to the guy ‘Ravi’ whom her parents chose for her. This guy Ravi is an educated moron. He pretends to be great husband in front of everyone including Vani’s parents. But everyday Vani gets disrespected, mistreated, dominated when they are alone in the house. Every night he forces Vani to have sex never ever caring about what she wants. Vani tries a lot to compromise and cooperate still thinking about her parents’ reputation.

Then one days she manages to go back to her college re-union and meet Akaash and other friends after so long. Akaash decides to give her the feelings in those few days to make her realize what kind of love and life she deserves.

When Akaash and other two friends visits Vani’s parents’ home to see her off, incidentally her husband Ravi turns up. After going through a tough inner battle, Vani decides to stand up for herself that night. She divorces Ravi and get admission in MBA college. And finally unite with the love she deserves – Akaash.

 

Akaash Vani – The Night Vani Dares

 

I want you to watch this video. The night Vani finally decides enough is enough! The night Vani stand up not just for herself but for countless women all over the world who aren’t living the life they deserve. I am trying to give a script of the conversation between Vani, her husband and her parents. As this conversation contains some gems of wisdom.

 

Vani’s father: What happened?

Ravi: Dad. I…

Vani: I can’t stay with Ravi.

Father: What do you mean?

Vani: I want a divorce.

Ravi: What!

Father: What rubbish are you talking about?

Vani: What are you afraid of? That what will people say? What if this was happening with sister? If her marriage was falling apart. You would have been happy and felt let her pay for whatever she has done. As that mistake was made by her. And this is your mistake, so why do you want me to compromise? Only because this mistake is done by you do you want me to pay for it throughout my life?

Vani’s mother: But my dear, we have always thought in your best interest. And even now we are doing the same.

Vani: Lie. Absolutely lie. You are not saying this in my best interest but to protect your pride in the society. I am not saying that parents should have no right in choosing partner for their children. But if children are unhappy, shouldn’t parents own up the responsibility? Today, I just want to ask this one thing to you that why when a daughter tells her father that the partner they have chosen for her is not right. Why then is she told to compromise? And assured falsely that everything will be fine. And when the same mistake is committed by a daughter in choosing a wrong partner she is mocked and asked to pay for her own mistake.

Mother: But what is that which is lacking in your life? This is a common thing in all households. Just once you start a family…

Vani: Why can’t you understand that starting a family isn’t the solution? I would be even more trapped then. This is a shattered relationship. When I can’t stand the person for a single moment, how can I think of giving birth a new life with him? If in every house the wife is raped then I don’t want to live in such a house. If more than my happiness, you are bothered about what the society would think and how they would perceive, then No. I am not prepared to bear the consequences of your mistake. No matter whose mistake it is in life and however big one shouldn’t be stopped from living.

Ravi: Dad, why are you quiet? In your respect I am not saying anything. But my own wife, who is my pride is tarnishing my pride in front of everyone…

Vani: Which pride are you talking about? The one that you rape every night? or the one that you can’t even protect if someone tries to molest during the day?

Ravi: I have been bearing this Dad only respecting you but it’s too much. I didn’t want to do this but now only I have to set this right.

( Ravi tries to drag Vani to their room. Vani frees herself and slap him hard. When Ravi tries to beat her back, Akaash comes in between the two)

Ravi: Oh! So this is the real reason! And I am being blamed in vain. It’s only my mistake that I associated myself with such a dis-reputed family.

Father: Did you see Vani, because of you what did we have to hear?

Vani: If only I could tell you that because of you what I had to bear! ( Vani, Akaash and their friends leave the house)

 

Akaash Vani -The Lessons

 

Well, what do you think? Don’t you think that life is too precious to waste worrying about what others will think or say? Because of this fear, people are wasting their lives not just in wrong relationships but also in wrong careers too. May be that’s a topic of another post. I want to keep our discussion more focused on relationship in this post.

The concept of arrange marriage always seemed very weird to me. You may argue that there are many examples of happy couples in arrange marriages & also many failed relationships in love marriages. Yes, I agree. But my point is, how can someone else decides who you are going to spend your whole life with? How can you spend the first night in bed ( I am not talking about having sex, just sleeping) with someone you don’t love or even don’t know at all? How can spend 24 hours with a complete stranger if you don’t know anything about that person? Yes! I know you can make mistake too while choosing your life partner by yourself. But isn’t that better to make mistake from your own decision than to live life with other’s decision & always regret what if you could live better?

Don’t you think parents should educate their children about life & relationship and then let them choose their partner by themselves? Don’t you think parents should give the assurance to their children that no matter whatever happens they’ll always be there for their children? How can society be more important to parents than their children’s happiness?

I have seen so many people who are living a lie just to please their parents/partners/children. Well, I appreciate their love & sacrifice for their loved ones. But the truth is: you can’t make anyone happy. Not even your closed ones. Happiness is a conscious decision by self. No one else can gift it to you. Neither you can gift it to other. Richard Bach rightly said “Your only obligation in any lifetime is to be true to yourself. Being true to anyone else or anything else is impossible” . So true!

Please understand this, when you are sacrificing the life you deserve to please someone else, you are not doing something noble. You are committing a sin depriving the most important person in you life – YOU- from everything life had in store for you.

And it doesn’t matter whether the mistake is yours or your parents’, dare to accept it as mistake and move on! What’s the point in wasting the rest of your life for one mistake?

I was discussing all these with my mom. She asked me “What if the wife has got children? Would you still suggest her to end the relationship? Don’t you think that will badly affect the children’s life? ” My answer was: “Yes! I will still suggest the same. Yes the children may get hurt ( or will surely get hurt) to see their parents separate. But they’ll understand gradually when they grow up. But when the couple continue the dysfunctional relationship with frequent arguments, shouting, loveless relationship do you think that creates any better impression in the children’s mind?” Mom didn’t have any answer. If you have any, let me know.

Ofcourse I agree that people should be patient in their relationships. Small ups & downs are part of every relationships. People should learn & grow together in love. But everything has a limit. And that limit is the cost of your precious life. When that’s at stake, you should dare to get out of that relationship & start living the life you always wanted.

Being born and brought up in a very middle class Indian family from a small town, I have seen these situations around me all my life. I have seen women spending their whole lives serving family forgetting that they also deserve to live life in a way they want. Inspiring women to live their best life for last 7 years. Always wanted to send this message to more and more people. I’m glad that Luv Ranjan made this wonderful movie Akaash Vani with the same message. But you know the tragedy? Movies with such wonderful message becomes a box office disaster. And mindless movies with flashy sets, superstar casting, sexy item numbers, crazy fight scenes end up becoming blockbusters in our country.

I intend to encourage more people to watch this movie. If we audience don’t appreciate these film makers how can we expect more good movies that can make a positive difference to our society?

Please share you views in the comment section. I’d love to know about your opinion. If you share the same opinion as mine, please share this video/post to all those who might benefit from it. If you want to talk about any relationship issues feel free to consult me on Wizpert.

 

Photo Courtesty: AkaashVani Facebook Page.